How many times have you heard that falling in love and getting into a relationship is easy but maintaining it is difficult? Unfortunately, in the era of situationships, even committing to a long-term relationship isn’t easy anymore. So when you do find the right person, we’d say appreciate it and value it with your whole heart. However, sometimes, when people get very comfortable with a partner, they may stop putting in enough effort or giving their relationship the attention it deserves—and needs—to thrive.
According to a study titled ‘People Are More Generous to a Partner Who Pays Attention to Them’ (the title completely gives it away), published in Sage Journals in 2017, high attention relationships also have a higher amount of intimacy. It also says you will be kinder to a partner who is giving you attention.
Understandably, if this attention is pulled out of the equation, it can lead to more problems than we realise. Here’s what lack of attention does to a relationship:
One or both partners feel neglected
When there is a lack of attention in a relationship, the partner whose needs are not being met feels invisible. They may feel like their partner is not considering them, and will constantly long for them. This eventually may lead to disappointment and withdrawal.
There is heightened resentment
In many relationships, when one person feels ignored or neglected, they usually talk about it with their partner after it happens a few times. But if their partner doesn't make an effort to give them more attention, the person feeling neglected might start feeling resentful. They might think their partner isn't listening to them or paying heed to their feelings, something you do not expect from a loved one.
It leads to insecurity
Lack of attention can make one question if their partner is still interested in or attracted to them. They may also wonder if their partner is giving attention elsewhere. These thoughts, on a regular basis, lead to relationship anxiety, and unknowingly, the neglected partner may start behaving feeling more insecured and assuming the worst. This further leads to more conflicts in relationships, as the neglecting partner fails to understand what is truly bothering them.
Relationship satisfaction reduces
With resentment and insecurity seeping in, the relationship, which used to light up a person’s life, starts making them feel melancholic. People often start noticing the happy couples around them and feel like they are not in a good place. They feel a sense of hopelessness which reduces relationship satisfaction.
Couples feel disconnected
With a lack of attention and ruptured communication, it is easy for couples to start feeling disconnected. They may stop seeking the connection and being each other’s go-to individuals for whatever happens in their lives. If you’ve reached this stage, consider it an urgent situation so you can salvage the relationship in time.
Physical intimacy deteriorates
The partner who isn’t getting enough attention feels less appreciated and invisible. This kills the mood for physical intimacy, forcing couples to start focusing more on tasks they have on hand and less on canoodling with their boo.
It also affects your mental well-being
If one's needs are constantly not being met and they feel neglected in the relationship, chances are that it will start impacting their overall happiness in life. They may feel lonely, sad, confused, angry, and experience self-doubt. Their productivity may reduce and they may even feel less motivated to enjoy things they do.
Also read: How to handle conflicts with your fiancé
Also read: Harmful communication patterns to avoid in a fight with your partner
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