How to nail your bridesmaid speech

Remember when Naina (aka Deepika Padukone) gave a toast at her best friend Aditi's (aka Kalki Koechlin) wedding in Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani? But before you start thinking of Naina’s dazzling blue sari that became a farewell favourite or Bunny’s (aka Ranbir Kapoor) dance moves to Badtameez Dil, stop. We’re actually talking about the speech and nothing else. Why? Because it was the quintessentially perfect bridesmaid speech. Here’s why:

1. She made it personal, a story of their friendship
2. She intertwined it with anecdotes
3. She began with the bride and their friendship and ended with a couple
4. She kept it short and positive

All markers of a great bridesmaid speech blueprint. 

The point of a bridesmaid speech is to celebrate the couple and your relationship with them. And the best way to do it is to keep it personal, but not so personal that no one but the two of you enjoy it. Knowing that ultimately it is for every guest attending to celebrate the couple too is key. Which also means that boring them with a never ending saga about your friendship and all the great times you have had is setting yourself up for a roomful of yawns and, let’s be real, failure. 

Despite having the above pointers, writing a speech can be a daunting task. Not everyone is a great writer, and, more so, putting all the emotions on paper, to say it out loud to hundreds of guests cannot be easy. But, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered with these easy steps that will leave you, most likely, with a good speech. 

1. Write down your memories and emotions: For a couple of evenings, sit down for 20 minutes each for some freeform writing. This is not the time to think about structure or edits, Chandler jokes or other very cinematic bridesmaid speeches. It is about spilling your feelings onto paper without thought, the editing will come after. And the following steps will help you with it.   
2. Get rid of generic praise: You’re a bridesmaid for a reason, you possibly know the bride the best, and keeping anything generic only means a yawn fest. 
3. It is not about you: Delete all the me’s and I’s. You are talking about your friendship with the bride and the couple. 
4. DO NOT mention ex’s: Need we even explain why?
5. Keep it short: Remember the yawns. No one wants to listen to a novel while their minds are thinking of food. 
6. Finally, the theatrics: It is a performance after all, and the same rules apply. Pause to allow the guests to laugh, or even between sentences. No one wants a rambler. And, practice, practice, practice. 

And that’s it, you’ve got yourself a bawler, ROLF-er, or both right there. Your speech will we one that they are going to remember for years to come.