The newlywed guide to splitting bills fairly

Amongst the many shared responsibilities that ensure a marriage is one based on mutual understanding is how the couple manages their expenses. Best addressed right at the beginning, this discussion will ensure that financial disagreements—one of the leading causes of marital stress—will be reduced to bare minimum, if at all. Having both partners on the same page and splitting bills when it comes to their household expenses is the stepping stone towards building transparency and avoiding any misunderstandings, eventually paving the way for a happy married life.

Why is it a good strategy? 

Splitting expenses isn’t just about making it a level playing field, but more about building a balanced financial dynamic that works for both partners. 

Promotes transparency and equality: By splitting expenses, both partners are well aware of household and external costs. Such openness fosters trust and ensures that neither of them feels burdened or left in the dark. Sharing bills creates a sense of equality where people don’t find themselves in situations where they feel they’re being taken advantage of. 

Helps the couple be more financially responsible: Splitting expenses encourages the couple to budget and manage their finances better. Such small steps help them prepare for larger financial goals, such as buying a house or starting a family.

Minimises resentment: When both partners split the bills and contribute to household costs, it minimises the likelihood of arguments about which individual is paying more, creating a healthier environment for the relationship.

Popular ways to split bills

A 50-50 split: Both partners contribute equally to household costs, regardless of their individual incomes. While it’s pretty simple and straightforward should both partners be earning similar amounts of money, the system may not work should there be income disparity. 

Proportional to income: This method sees both partners contribute a percentage of income to the total expenses, which is proportionate to their own income. For example, if one partner earns 60% of the total household income, they contribute 60% of the bills. It balances the financial burden by earning capacity, making it fairer for both partners.

Divide by the type of expense: The expenses are segregated in this system by category. One of the partners can pay for the rent while the other takes care of the groceries and other utilities. A reason why this could lead to a problem is if and when expenses within a category fluctuate significantly.

The challenges of splitting bills

Despite all the well-established systems to split the bills, it's not without its challenges. For instance, there could be a difference in spending habits should one partner be a spendthrift while the other tends to save. This would make defining what constitutes a ‘necessary’ expense tough. Should the income gap be significant, splitting bills (even when using proportional methods) can feel unfair. If there is no conversation about it, one of the partners might feel that their efforts are undervalued or that they are carrying a load they shouldn’t be. Lastly, any unforeseen circumstances that might disrupt the existing system need immense flexibility and understanding from both partners.  

Ways to overcome the hurdles

Make sure that you set expectations that are clear right from the very beginning. Discuss your finances and goals with your partner to find a system that works for both of you before deciding the way forward. It’s also important to remember that as things and circumstances change, so will your financial arrangements. Do take the time out to check in with your partner to see if your method is working and what needs to change. Stay flexible and open to change if you want things to work. 

Lead image: Netflix

Also read: Why should you have a joint account with your partner?

Also read: Here’s what every woman needs to know about her personal finances before tying the knot