Here's why marrying your best friend is still elite relationship advice
Once the honeymoon phase fades, actually liking each other matters more than you think.
“The secret to a long and happy marriage? Marry your best friend.”
We’ve all heard this at some point in our lives. And honestly, there may be some truth to it. After all, friendships are some of the most meaningful and enduring relationships in our lives. They’re built on trust, loyalty, and an understanding that is often difficult to replicate, especially with your best friend.
They’re often the ones who’ve seen the best and worst parts of you—your worst decisions, your weird habits, the way you overreact to a text, all of it, and they still choose to stick around. So in many ways, it makes sense to believe that love blossoming from a friendship could be the recipe for a happy marriage. Not to mention, pop culture has done a stellar job of selling us the idea.
Take Bollywood for instance. How many times have we watched Shah Rukh Khan fall in love with his best friend because apparently love is friendship (you know the line)? The plot is almost always the same. Two best friends spend years insisting, “We’re just friends,” until one of them falls for someone else. Suddenly, the other is spiralling with questions like, “Why do I care? Why is this bothering me? Since when did I feel this way?” Cue the grand realisation, followed by a dramatic sprint to the airport, or interrupting a wedding, or some other cinematic declaration of love that says, “Hey, you were always the one!”
Of course, not every great relationship starts with two best friends falling in love. But there is a reason this advice has stood the test of time. In a culture that often prioritises chemistry, instant sparks, and grand romantic gestures, friendship reminds us that lasting relationships are built on something much quieter: genuinely enjoying each other’s company. Once the butterflies settle and real life kicks in, it’s the friendship, the laughter, the trust, and simply liking each other that often becomes the glue holding everything together.
Why friendship matters more than a fairy-tale love story
For decades, relationship experts have argued that friendship isn’t just a nice bonus in a marriage; it’s one of the strongest predictors of long-term relationship satisfaction. Couples who see each other as close friends often communicate better, recover from conflict more easily, and report happier, more fulfilling relationships over time.
But what does “marrying your best friend” actually mean? Is it about falling for someone you’ve known since school, or is it about becoming best friends after you’ve fallen in love?
According to relationship experts, the latter is often what matters more. While some couples begin as close friends, plenty meet through dating apps, work, mutual friends, or complete chance. What tends to separate happy, long-lasting couples isn’t how they met, but what they build together over time. And at the centre of that is friendship.
Being married to your best friend doesn’t mean you spend every waking second together or that your partner replaces every other important relationship in your life. It means genuinely liking the person you’re with. It’s having someone you want to tell first when something exciting happens, someone who’ll sit through your quarter-life crisis, laugh at your terrible jokes, and happily accompany you on the world’s most boring grocery run.
It’s feeling emotionally safe enough to be your full, unfiltered self, without worrying that every disagreement or bad day will threaten the relationship.
Friendship is the foundation, not the whole relationship
As comforting as the phrase “marry your best friend” sounds, it’s also easy to oversimplify what makes a relationship work.
Friendship is important, but so are attraction, shared values, communication, mutual respect, and the willingness to grow together. You can adore your best friend and still not be romantically compatible with them. Likewise, you can fall deeply in love with someone you didn’t know well at first and gradually build a friendship that’s just as meaningful.
In other words, friendship isn’t the entire recipe; it’s one of the key ingredients. Maybe that’s why "marry your best friend” remains some of the best relationship advice we have. Not because your soulmate has to start out as your best friend, but because the happiest marriages often end up looking a lot like the strongest friendships.
Once the butterflies settle and life becomes less about grand gestures and more about splitting chores, paying bills, or deciding what to order for dinner, it’s friendship that quietly keeps the relationship going. Romance may bring you together, but genuinely liking each other is often what helps you stay.
Lead image: IMDb
Also read: The difficult conversations that make married life easier