A guide to writing vows that reflect your journey together

When you stand in front of the people you love, ready to exchange vows with your partner, the weight of the moment is impossible to ignore. The promises you make are not just words—they’re the foundation of a lifelong journey. But how do you find the right words that truly capture the essence of your relationship and the promises you’re about to make? It can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re looking to reflect a love that is as personal as the bond you share.

The truth is, writing vows doesn’t need to be a daunting task. You don’t have to follow a script or write anything overly poetic. The best vows come from the heart. They are simple, raw, and deeply meaningful. They reflect who you are as a couple—your quirks, your strengths, the moments that have defined your relationship, and the future you see together.

Here are some thoughts to help guide you as you write vows that will make the moment unforgettable, not just for you, but for the one you love:

Start with your story

Every couple has a unique journey. Maybe you met by chance, or maybe it was a moment you both knew would change your lives forever. Think about the little things that have made your relationship special. Is it the way they make you laugh when you’re having a tough day? Or how they show up for you, even when the world feels like it’s falling apart? Reflect on the moments that have shaped your connection. These are the details that will make your vows truly yours.

Example:
"When we first met, I had no idea that you’d become my best friend, my biggest supporter, and the person I’d want to build my life with. It wasn’t the big moments that made me fall in love with you—it was the quiet, everyday things. The way you listen, even when I’m rambling, and the way you always know how to make me feel at home."

Look to the future with hope

While vows are rooted in the present, there’s something undeniably powerful about looking ahead, too. What kind of future do you dream of building together? It doesn’t have to be about big milestones or perfect plans. It’s about the journey you want to take, side by side.

Example:
"I promise to walk with you through all the unknowns that lie ahead. I vow to embrace every challenge with you, knowing we’ll face it together. Whatever the future brings, I’ll be there to build it with you, one day at a time."

Make promises that feel true

When you think about your lives together, it’s easy to get caught up in grand ideas of what you’ll do or where you’ll go. But the real beauty of vows is in the small promises you make to each other. What do you need from one another? What are you willing to give? Maybe it’s something as simple as making sure there’s always coffee in the morning or promising to put away the phone when you’re together. No promise is too small if it’s true to your relationship.

Example:
"I vow to always listen, even when I don’t understand right away. I vow to support your dreams, even if they take us on unexpected paths. I promise to never take us for granted, to never stop cherishing what we’ve built, and to be present in every moment we share."

Include a touch of humour or lightness

Not everything has to be heavy. If humour is a part of your relationship, let it shine through in your vows. If you and your partner have inside jokes or shared quirks that make you laugh, add them in. The beauty of this moment is that it’s uniquely yours—serious and silly all at once.

Example:
"I vow to always put the toilet seat down, even when it’s late at night and I’m half-asleep. I promise to always share the last slice of pizza, even when I really want it for myself. And I promise to love you, even on the days when we both know I’m impossible to deal with."

Root yourself in the present

It’s tempting to only think of your vows as promises for the future, but don’t forget to honour the present. What you’re promising today is just as important as what you will promise tomorrow. The future is an extension of everything you’ve already created together.

Example:
"As we begin this new chapter, I vow to face each day with you, no matter what it brings. I promise to keep growing with you, learning with you, and cherishing you. And as we walk this journey together, I will always be here to hold your hand through it all."

Finish with a powerful declaration of love

In the end, your vows should be a declaration of your love. Speak plainly. Speak from the heart. This is the moment to promise, with your whole being, that no matter what comes your way, you will choose them, time and time again.

Example:
"I love you more than I ever thought I could love someone, and I choose you, every day, for the rest of my life."

Featured image credit: Kriti Kharbanda/Instagram

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